Pep talks done right

So, I recently had something of a rough patch at work. We lost two members of our five-person editorial team in one month—darn lousy timing, exploring spirits, and nice guys on the coast who make marriage proposals.

Marnette Denell Falley

And no offense to the kind co-workers who tried to offer a pick-me-up, but I decided we needed company training in how to give a pep talk that's actually uplifting. You know, the kind of exchange that actually leaves you feeling better.

Coaches seem to manage this pep talk trick all the time. They find the right words to change the momentum of a game. They inspire their players to reach deeper and improve their performance. They lay the groundwork for a comeback.

Personally, I don't think it's that easy. But I figured someone must know how to do it effectively. So I got some expert advice from James Campbell Quick, a Goolsby professor at the University of Texas at Arlington. "A good pep talk touches people at an emotional level," he says. "Done right, pep talks lift people up and energize and inspire them."

So, you need to start with emotion, says this expert in leadership and motivation. Offer support. Acknowledge the person's feelings and the difficulty of the situation. "Particularly if it's a case where something bad has happened, you need to let those tough feelings drain before the healing process can begin and you can move forward," Quick says.

Next, paint a picture of the goal and the path. Great pep talks are less about cognitive issues and more about things that touch our hearts, Quick says. So you want to create an image and help the person you're talking to see your vision and find his or her place in that picture.

The next element: offer feedback. Let your team member know what he or she is doing well. After all, you want the person to keep doing that—and maybe even do it more.

When team members know you believe in them, you can also offer advice about what they can do better to improve and become more effective. "Giving great feedback comes from being a strong supporter and a careful observer," Quick says.

I asked if offering to help is also part of the picture. And the answer, like many about working with people, depends. "You need to encourage your employees to do for themselves what they can, should, and must," Quick says. But when someone has reached his or her limit, you need to recognize that and offer help. One caution: "If you help too much, you display lack of confidence in his or her ability to do the job," he says.

While unbreakable management laws are few and far between, Quick says this comes closer than almost any: The tougher the goal, the higher people can reach. "In other words, higher goals lead to higher levels of performance," he says.

Of course, you can never put anything in someone that's not there, he says. But you can see the greatness inside and invite it out. And surely, your team members will find that inspiring.

Marnette Denell Falley, Editor

ve@advanstar.com